CABIN FEVER

Its been ages since I have been out in the woods and even though I was sick, I jumped at the opportunity to take a drive down-range with Steve.  We didn't have passes so we could only go so far, but that was fine with me, I needed to get out.  Once we got as far as we could drive, we got out to walk in.  Steve suggested that we take the road rather than to try hiking up the hill since I was still feeling the effects of the bug that had hit me during the week.  That was fine with me, I learned long ago to dread the mention of the word 'UP'.  It was a bad word in my book.  So we hiked along the road, crunching in the snow and ice.  The sun was warm, it was a beautiful New Year's day.  But then it happened, we ran out of road, and it was either go 'UP' or go back.  Steve suggested that we cut around to get 'HIGHER' so we could see better.  I wasn't ready to go back so I agreed.  We were half way up the cliff before I realized that 'HIGHER' was just another word for 'UP'.  Steve had tricked me!

So anyhow we're hiking up a hillside covered with snow, which is a good thing because had I known what was under the snow I would never have attempted to scale the mountain.  It was loose shale and  cactus!  And what wasn't covered with snow covered shale and cactus was covered with scrub-oak, which Steve pushed through and managed to hit me with the backlash every time.  I swear he was trying to hit me. 

And then it happened... almost simultaneously Steve motioned to be silent and still... and my nose started running.  And I'm not talking slow drip, I mean flash flood!  I wiped my nose with my glove and the finger quickly became soaked with snot.  I tried to sniff silently, but lets face it, when your sinuses decide to purge themselves, there's no delicate sniffs involved.  I had to resort to using the next finger of my glove, and then when it became staturated... the next. 

Finally I made the decision to pull out my tissue.  There is no camoflauge tissue... I was stuck with pure white that flashed like a flag in the woods, and I blew!  And the unthinkable happened... I ran out of room on the tissue!  I would have to get another one.  But what to do with the used one, now filled with phlegm?  I rolled it gently into a little package, careful not to crush it and cause seepage... and I placed it in my jacket pocket.  I did the same with the second, and then the third tissue.  I think that I must surely be allergic to elk because it never failed, every time we sneaked up on one, my nose would start running and it takes every ounce of will power not to suck it in and give away our presence.

We ended up going home without a clear sighting but that was okay because I thoroughly enjoy getting out, even if just to walk and look around.  I was a little preoccupied on the walk back though... I didn't want to absent mindedly stick my hand into my jacket pocket and squish the tissues full of snot!  I must have lost at least a pound in weight just in snot alone!